It's that time of year again, when the brightest young stars of the pop music world descend on London for a riotous night of glitz, glamour, drunken debauchery, and a bit of music. Oh, and a few awards too.Unsurprisingly there's an urban theme to nominees this year, Tinie Tempah leads the field looking to clear up in four categories, while Plan B, Eminem, Cee Lo Green and Taio Cruz also have a look in. Mercury Prize winners The xx are doing their bit for the indie side of things with three nominations, and Mumford & Sons also get three well earned nominations. There's one guaranteed winner already too, with the Critic's Choice already awarded to the amazing Jessie J.
The big headline performances on the night will come from Rihanna, Take That, and Best International Group nominees Arcade Fire.
Stick with us here on Popsiculture throughout as we'll be updating on proceedings throughout the evening.
8:00 - Take That kick things off with an army of riot police in tow. They give a rabble rousing performance of Kidz, and little Mark Owen looks like a little kid at christmas.
James Cordon is here too, and introduces us to the new Vivienne Westwood designed Brit statuette.
Dizzee Rascal's on the stage, and it's time for...
British Male Solo Artist
Mark Ronson
Paul Weller
Plan B
Robert Plant
Tinie Tempah
...and the winner is: Plan B
It's a short but sweet acceptance speech - nods go to the family and the people who've been there from the start, it seems. Nicely done, and we're into commercials...
8:10 - Phew first ad breaks come just in time to fill up some wine glasses. If this is going to the expected plan we should have Best British Female Solo Artist up next. Anyone but Paloma Faith please.
But first it's an emotional performance from Adele that leaves host James Corden visibly moved, followed by the first VT of the Album of the Year nominees, for the incredible Mumford & Sons:
Mumford & Sons - Sigh No More
8:17 It's Bieber fever, as James Corden makes Justin feel slightly ill-at-ease for a moment, before the proper flirting begins.
Oo, it's Best British Breakthrough next, with Fearne Cotton looking a bit strobey.
British Breakthrough Act
Ellie Goulding
Mumford & Sons
Rumer
Tinie Tempah
The xx
...and Tinie Tempah will be glad to have won at least one of his nominations tonight!
Tinie: "I got a Brit award!" Goddamit Tempah, you've done it again.
8:23 Hey, it's Boris Becker to present Best International Album. The nominations are:
International Album
Arcade Fire - The Suburbs
Cee Lo Green - The Lady Killer
Eminem - Recovery
Katy Perry - Teenage Dream
Kings of Leon - Come Around Sundown
...and the award goes to Arcade Fire - The Suburbs
Arcade Fire are so brilliantly uncool, they really are living the dream. Who says being in a band isn't the way to make friends?
8:27 Rihanna's here, looking like the physical embodiment of scarlet fever. Isn't she a bit overdressed?
8:30 That's much better.
What a great six and a half minutes of television. Ad break coming up, if you need to dash to the kitchen for more wine!
8:33 - Gosh this is hard work. The blogging I mean, not watching the Brits. I'm actually quite enjoying the Brits this year. I feel strangely positive about this the nominees this time around.
8:38 It's the Critics' Choice award, with Mark Ronson and last year's winner, the slightly adorable Ellie Goulding. Only - don't we already know Jessie J won this one? Oh yeah, they're admitting we already know that... that's OK then. Sucks to be the other nominees though...
Critics' Choice
Jessie J
James Blake
The Vaccines
...and the winner is Jessie J (but you already knew that...)
I like Jessie J even more after a humble and, again, emotional acceptance speech.
It's back to the Album of the Year nominations, and this time it's...
Tinie Tempah - Disc-Overy
8:43 - Mumford & Sons, I love you. Pure, unadulterated music with simplicity yet distinction. It's like the good old days. Please stay forever.
From Boris Becker to Lewis Hamilton, and it's time for Best International Male Solo Artist:
International Male Solo Artist
Bruce Springsteen
Cee Lo Green
David Guetta
Eminem
Kanye West
...and the winner is Cee Lo Green - YES!!!!!!!
This sounds like it could be a long thank you... lucky there's an ad break coming up soon.
8:55 Alan Carr's here to announce the winner of Best British Single
The nominations are:
British Single
Alexandra Burke ft Pitbull - All Night Long
Cheryl Cole - Parachute
Florence + The Machine - You've Got The Love
Matt Cardle - When We Collide
Olly Murs - Please Don't Let Me Go
Plan B - She Said
Scouting For Girls - This Ain't A Love Song
Taio Cruz - Dynamite
Tinie Tempah - Pass Out
The Wanted - All Time Low
...and the winner is Tinie Tempah - Pass Out. Nice one Tinie.
That was a bit of a stand-off, wasn't it? Decent speech in the end though. Wonder where he is, anyway?
8:58 Hey, Nickie's gonna be pleased. It's Simon le Bon and John Taylor to present Best International Group.
International Group
Arcade Fire
The Black Eyed Peas
Kings of Leon
The Script
Vampire Weekend
...and it's a second award for the ingenious Arcade Fire. Well done guys, well deserved.
More live music at 9:01 and it's time for Plan B to take to the stage for a pretty decent interpretation of the video. Is it me, or does he look a bit like Suggs tonight?
Well that was a show. A punch-up, riot police and a person actually on fire. But no time to catch your breath, because we're straight into the next Best Album profile VT, and it's:
The xx - xx
A bit of a chat with Cee Lo Green, who definitely seems jet-lagged, and it's time to recharge those glasses! Back after the break...
9:14 Avril Lavigne's come as a young Kylie Minogue, while Will Young just looks pretty suave. What award is this again? Oh yeah...
International Breakthrough Act
Bruno Mars
Glee Cast
Justin Bieber
The National
The Temper Trap
...and the winner is Justin Bieber. Fuck you Glee. It's the lesser of two evils.
Bieber: "Mike! Mike! MIIIIIIKKKKKKEEEEEE!!!!!!!!" Interesting acceptance speech.
Oh well, another minute, another minstrel. It's Boy George! To read the nominations for:
British Female Solo Artist
Cheryl Cole
Ellie Goulding
Laura Marling
Paloma Faith
Rumer
...and the winner is Laura Marling - I wouldn't have predicted that one, but I'm pretty delighted for her.
9:20 More live music - it's Arcade Fire. They must be buzzing pretty hard right now after a night like this. No huge production, but no stripped-back simplicity - just a good old stage music show, by the look of things.
Mark Ronson says everything's fantastic. But he has no idea who Mike is. Bad work, Ronson.
Another Best Album VT (that stands for video tape). Could they do it? Could this be the night - again - for...
Take That - Progress?
Robbie's talking cliches again - "sometimes you've gotta get back on the horse". Sometimes the horse just kicks you in the chest and your heart stops dead. Sometimes. One time. Maybe...
Anyway, ad break. Back in a bit guys!
9:32 It's Chezza to read the nominations for Best International Female Solo Artist:
International Female Solo Artist
Alicia Keys
Katy Perry
Kylie Minogue
Rihanna
Robyn
Who do we reckon? It's a close one...
...and the winner is Rihanna. Oh, she got dressed. I wonder if she's still got the lacy black stuff on under that... I feel faint.
I'm pulling myself together with a rousing performance from Tinie Tempah. Not a fan of rap, but he makes the best of it - I got no beef here.
9:41 This suddenly looks like The X Factor, with Dermot O'Leary to read the nominations for Best British Group.
British Group
Biffy Clyro
Gorillaz
Mumford & Sons
Take That
The xx
Should we expect a huge, dramatic pause before he reads the name out?
The winner is...
...
...
...
...
...
Take That
Oh my god I hate Robbie Williams so bad it hurts. It actually hurts. What a great four-piece they were.
Anyway, it's time for another Album of the Year VT, and it's:
Plan B - The Defamation of Strickland Banks
Followed by an interview with Plan B that really doesn't do good things for him. Firstly, Plan B is NOT a person's name. It's a band name at best. Secondly, "a lot more people will be open to hip hop because of what I've done" is not a good way to sound meek, Plan. Or should I call you Mr B?
It's nice of them to keep putting ad breaks in every time I get worked up. I'll be right back...
9:51 We're on the final leg now, and it's time, finally, to find out who's won:
MasterCard British Album of the Year
Mumford & Sons - Sigh No More
Plan B - The Defamation of Strickland Banks
Take That - Progress
Tinie Tempah - Disc-Overy
The xx - xx
Rock royalty Roger Daltrey is here to present, although I'm not sure he knows where the camera is. I'd be happy with The xx, Mumford & Sons, Take That...
...and the winner is Mumford & Sons - Sigh No More. I'm so glad.
A slightly shortened acceptance speech - it looks like all that "MIIIIIKKKKKKKKKEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!" and "LAAAAAABBBBRRRRIIIIIINNNNNTTTTTTHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!" nonsense stole a few too many minutes earlier on. But never mind, here's Cee Lo Green to close the show. Not sure what happened to the Best British Producer award - maybe they'll mention it in the closing credits? Maybe nobody cares anyway.
I DID NOT AGREE TO PALOMA FAITH. SOMETHING HAS TO BE DONE.
She not so much duets as caterwauls her way through a previously pretty perfect song, like some kind of veiled haridan here purely to ruin my night. Cee Lo, I'm sorry. This isn't what the UK is about, I swear. I don't even know where she came from. She wasn't there a minute ago.
Almost seamlessly, the live performance segues into the end-credit music, and we're almost done here. No mention of Best British Producer, but here are the nominations - I'll try and find out who won and let you know! Goodnight Seattle, I love you.
Best British Producer nominees:
Ethan Johns
John Leckie
Markus Dravs
Mike Pela
Stuart Price
...oh, hey, the winner was Markus Dravs. Nice one mate.
Later, winners!
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